Pink – Try

Where there is desire
There is gonna be a flame
Where there is a flame
Someone’s bound to get burned
But just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die
You’ve gotta get up and try

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Life Roads

open-road

Many times, the reason people fail is because they stop trying.

If You don’t give up on getting where you want to go, then you’re not on the wrong road; Even if the place you arrive at isn’t the one you were hoping for.

From there, just pick out another road and keep moving.

If you do that, eventually, you will arrive at your destination.

Just because you took the wrong path doesn’t mean you’ve failed.

Even if you end up on the worst road possible, even if it seems like the roughest, most difficult path ever, don’t give up.

It just takes a little determination to get there.

In the end, every road is a new experience, and a new lesson; It gets you somewhere.

Learn from the Journey, don’t focus on the destination.

Because All roads, even the wrong ones, are connected to the place you are looking for.

The Devil Wears Heels

I’m not much of a girly girl at all.

Now and again I may break out in a moment where I do the hair thing and the makeup (cough not really cough), but I really just can’t get into it like a lot of my friends. I’m not into keeping up with the latest fashion, I don’t care about style. I just want to be comfortable. I prefer T-shirts 3 times my size and hoodies and I love jeans. Most of the time I’m not even wearing clothes. I’ll be damned if I have to be fully clothed in my own home. I don’t do my hair often and I wear a durag on my head most of the time or I’m rocking the ponytail to its death. Shoe wise? My biggest problem comes in the form of the devil’s ultimate creation.

High Heels.

I hate those things. Mostly because I can’t walk in them and I can’t walk in them because I had no practice and I had no practice because I never had to wear them! I wasn’t pressured into wearing them. I didn’t have the type of friends that cared about things like that, and my family isn’t one of those families that care about them either. I like my sneakers and sandals. Why would I want to wear Heels, only to have them on for 10 minutes and have to change out of them into sandals anyways because my feet start to hurt? That just seems stupid.

However, lately, I feel like less of a woman because of it.

I look at pictures of everyone else going out and they look so lovely in them and then I look down at my feet and feel so ashamed. I mean, I have awesome legs, it comes with being damn near 6ft tall, so why not show them off? But at the same time I don’t want to embarrass myself and fall flat on my face trying to impress the masses who probably don’t give a damn anyways.

Curse my unstable equilibrium.

I do have some friends who try to get me to wear them and I wish they would understand that they are outside of my comfort zone and maybe they should just leave me alone until I am ready to wear them myself. Forcing me to do it will make me just run from them more. So It may make me a social pariah in the community of women, but that’s okay.

Some of them are really pretty though. I’m tempted on many occasions to buy some and practice walking in them. They do make me feel a lot sexier.

But On the other hand I like to think about it this way.

While They may look better than me wearing them, should there come a time when a derange psychopath chases us on a night out and they’re busy getting out of their shoes, I’ll be hauling ass down the stretch in my slippers.

Not a Likable Person

Lately, I’ve been getting the feeling that I’m not a very liked person.

I don’t know what it is, but I find that a lot of people where I come from (mostly females) don’t like me very much. And while it’s true that I don’t typically get along with girls, the ones that obviously don’t care for me do not have a very good reason. In fact, most of the arguments that I get into with them are over stupid things.

Twice I got into it with girls because I corrected their spelling. A SPELLING CORRECTION MIND YOU. It escalated into an argument and I may have gone over board but I kid you not, it could have been avoided if all they had done was ignore me, or just accept the fact that I was trying to HELP them.

The other time I got into it was because I made a general statement and the bimbo got all hot and bothered and assumed it was for her. But then she’s the type who likes attention and gets into it with everyone so That shouldn’t come as a surprise, but this isn’t about her.

Even people I have done nothing to and have never spoken to give me the impression that they don’t care to be near me and I can’t put my finger on what I have ever done to make folks dislike me. In fact,. I’m a pretty nice person. I can be straightforward and harsh, but I would think people would prefer the harsh truth than to be coddled with a lie. I sure am not going to lie to anyone just to make them feel better about themselves. I’m guessing that’s probably why people don’t like me. Because I’m not a coddler.

A lot of folks where I come from are bullies really. I don’t support this. So when others are laughing at “slander” I shake my head at it. I guess they don’t like me for this either. They find the bullying funny when I think it’s just ignorant. Since I’m not kissing their asses or hopping on their bandwagon, they don’t fancy me.

Speaking of ass kissing, I can write the most profound statement ever known to mankind and not get one like or comment about it, but the “popular” bimbo can say Hey or put up a picture of her face with a stupid ass caption that has NOTHING to do with her picture and get 600 likes and comments. What the ever loving fuck is wrong with you people? I can barely scrimmage up 2 likes on a photo and I would like to believe that I am not so hideous. Clearly there is some form of dementia happening here or folks are desperate to gain this person’s friendship/faking it/or in most cases trying to find a way into the person’s probably over mileaged genitals.

Honestly, if I have to suck up to folks, support harassment, and lie to people, then maybe I don’t want to be liked. I can live with having just a few friends because that isn’t the type of life I want to be apart of. It seems sad really.

So if this is really why you don’t like me. That’s fine. I do have friends, and I love them to the point where I consider them family.

I feel bad for these people though. I really do. It’s like they are living a lie. And maybe I don’t want to be liked by people who can’t think for themselves.

Maybe I’m not meant to be liked by yall….

And maybe yall are just plain……dumb.

Me? Lie? Never

I kinda hate people right now.

Ok hate is a strong term but they are pretty highly hated at the moment. If that is even a word. Spellcheck corrected me so I’m guessing it wasn’t.

Moving along. I’ve been called a liar and frankly I don’t understand why nor am I too happy about it. I may be many things, and a liar may occasionally be one of them (because come on, we all fib at one point) but I am Innocent this time!

What happened? I’ll save you the theatrics, apparently I failed to notify someone of something I was aware of and they called me a liar.

I was outraged!

I was then notified that “withholding information” is a form of lying.

Well Fuck that.

The way I see it, if I did not utter the words, I am not lying. It doesn’t even make sense. How can not saying something translate into a lie? I mean, It makes sense to say it’s WRONG, but to say I’m lying because I didn’t say anything? I would like some of the Crazy Cookies you’ve been eating because clearly you are out of your mind.

Hook me up to the lie detector baby!! Ask me the same thing and my silence shall prevail! That machine ain got nothing on me! It can’t work its magic if no words are coming out of my mouth.

But it is what it is. Call me a liar, but I will continue to let thy tongue be still!

Did any of this make sense? I feel like I was just rambling..

Well screw that too.

Not so Sincerely,

Your outraged Author.

Keeping In Touch

People always assume that when someone doesn’t hit them up, the person doesn’t care about them or isn’t trying to find time. I was one of those people. But I have come to understand that this isn’t necessarily true.

I have friends that I don’t talk to for months on end, but when we do speak it’s like there was never a gap in communication. Folks have their own lives to live and honestly it won’t kill you if you don’t hear from them in a while.

This is hardest when you have a spouse. I mean, anyone would be pissed if they hadn’t heard from their significant other in a week. I get antsy when I haven’t heard from him in a few days. I think that’s normal.

But communication is a two-way street. I hate when I haven’t heard from someone in a while and then they text me and ask why they haven’t heard from me. If you really wanted to talk to me, You would take your own phone and contact me. It’s not that hard really. Yes, you may get tired of being the one to always talk to the person first, but with that you have two options.

1) You can either stop talking to them first (duh) and let them do what they’re doing. If they want to talk to you, they will, if not, oh well.

2) Or you can keep doing what you’re doing and be the one to always reach out to the person/persons.

It’s really just that simple.

Just because I don’t keep in touch often doesn’t mean I don’t care, nor that I have stopped speaking to you. If you have a facebook or something, chances are I am watching in the background like the creeper that I am. I pay attention honestly. And when ready, I may just pop up and say HI! Or if I see you’re down, I’ll try to cheer you up. Hell, feel free to pop in if you have a problem. I sure won’t turn you away.

So think nothing of the silence.

Admit it, Even you get annoyed when someone tries to talk to you everyday at every waking moment. Lack of distance could just be what leads to you and that person/those people falling out.

Or maybe even though they are your friend, that person is just really boring to talk to…

What? Don’t be surprised. You know it’s true.

Broken

And then I felt sad because I realized that once people are broken in certain ways, they can’t ever be fixed, and this is something nobody ever tells you when you are young and it never fails to surprise you as you grow older as you see the people in your life break one by one. You wonder when your turn is going to be, or if it’s already happened.

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